Can I tell you how much I do not like 5:00 a.m.?
I haven’t been up this early–or let’s be real, stayed up this late–since college. Which has been a minute. Even with all four of my babies, they at least went back to sleep for a few hours. And now I
jump roll out of bed before the butt crack of dawn and I don’t like it.
But I have to do this because I am writing my second book. My sophomore effort. My #2. And 5:00 a.m. is the only time that I ever have a moment to think a thought all the way through to fruition. This is kinda important if you call yourself a writer.
And I am a writer. I accidentally wrote my first book called My Pink Champagne Life a few years ago. I didn’t start out to write a book; I had just been through a lot of changes and truly writing was my therapy. There were no expectations; no one even knew I was writing a book except my husband. And there were no deadlines. I was free to let my creative process go where it may. Which is why I wrote most of the book in late 2011-early 2012 and it didn’t come out until February of this year.
I’m not great with deadlines.
Now I have both expectations and deadlines and I’m a little bit nervous. Not to mention I still don’t really know what I’m doing. My plate is so much more full now that I’m on my next effort and I get a little scared. Since I write about my traveling circus family, I am opening up the door to our complete crazy for the whole world to view, judge, peer into. It’s a bit disconcerting if I think about it too long.
And this time around I’m writing about seriously hard and life-changing things. Life-shattering things. I don’t know about you other writers out there but for me it’s a bit like living through it all again when I write about the last two years of our story. I’m using words like PTSD and traumatic brain injury and financial hardships and four kids and baby spit up and caregiving, you know, real sexy topics.
But I believe in telling the truth. And the truth is our story isn’t always rainbows and butterflies like I would like it to be. My hope is that maybe my truth will help someone else in the midst of a truth they didn’t want any part of. That maybe our story and our crazy and our suffering followed by absolute redemption will give hope to someone who is buried in a dark corner and believes they are all alone.
Have I mentioned how much I hate 5:00 a.m.? For the foreseeable future this is my waking time. But I am trying to appreciate the benefits this provides me. I am watching sunrises that are gorgeous beyond belief. I get to hear and feel and breathe in the silence while everyone else is sleeping peacefully. There is an openness to my spirit at this time of the morning, before the day has corrupted my thoughts or pushed me down or some days, run me over. I am more alive, more vibrant, more me during my quiet time than any other part of the day.
It’s when I’m Meredith.
Not caregiver or mama or employee or chauffeur or wife or maid or any of the other hats that I wear. I love my hats. But sometimes it feels good to just be me.
I am a writer. Of books and thoughts and talks and life. It’s difficult sometimes, but it’s exactly where I am supposed to be.
(Photo credit Meredith Shafer 2015) Copyright Meredith Shafer 201
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A day late and a dollar short, but here it is! Thanks for your patience, hope you have a blessed day!
(photo credit Dan Bustamante, Twitter) Copyright Meredith Shafer 2015. I would love to connect with you on Facebook or Instagram at My Pink Champagne Life or Twitter @MyPinkChampLife. Swing by and say hello!
As the Ringmaster of my Traveling Circus, I often find myself in the midst of weird situations. My daughter has this imaginary friend named Jake. From State Farm. And he’s “got brown skin like bubba.”
Then there’s the tween-turning-teen-too-rapidly-for-me who has just started enjoying the fun of sleepovers. This means a herd of boys come through my kitchen, wipe out my pantry in a swarm of biblical proportion locusts, and leave only wrappers, crumbs, and a boy funk that doesn’t dissipate as soon as I would like.
Sweet baby boy has become ever more curious, enjoying opening every drawer, door and cupboard he can find. We’ve quickly learned that all outside doors must be locked or he’ll end up outside with only Charlie the Service Dog as his canine babysitter.
The seven year old is trying his hardest to do all the “school” we have him in this summer: speech therapy, occupational therapy. He looked at me one day and said, “Mama, I thought it was supposed to be summer!”
Me too, little man.
And of course, we have weekly wrestling matches with the VA, the doctors, the counselors and the Vet Center to help Mr. Wonderful and I find our way through this maze and haze of PTSD. It’s a really steep learning curve with lots of pop quizzes. I’m usually an A student, but this one has me stumped lots of days.
I have this terrific job that lets me work from home and meet awesome people in my community. I executive direct a foundation that I’ve loved for a dozen years and hope to continue at for many more.
Oh, and I’m trying to come back from taking a month off from book publicity, marketing events, signings, speaking engagements, much to my publisher’s chagrin. I took time off to be with family, which will always be my first priority. The powers that be didn’t think that would be the best idea but I know in my heart if I keep the important stuff at the top of the list, I won’t regret it, no matter how many books I sell or don’t.
Things have been even more circus-y around here than usual, and I’ve been needed at home. Period. There’s no worry or wishes or way I would’ve done this time any different. I know it’s not the way you should do things if you want to sell books. But I want my kids to grow from amazing little humans to amazing big humans and this summer I just needed to make sure I was present.
Available for all my kiddos and Mr. Wonderful.
The rest will fall into place, working it’s way into our five ring Traveling Circus however it will. And I am beyond positive I’m going to look back on this time and be so glad that I made these choices.
Anything going on with y’all that has involved choices that others disagreed with? Leave me a comment, I’d love to hear that I’m not alone!
(Photo credit Meredith Shafer 2015) I would love to connect with you on Facebook or Instagram at My Pink Champagne Life or Twitter @MyPinkChampLife. Swing by and say hello!
You made it to Wednesday-congratulations!
(Photo credit Vintager on etsy.com)
And if you live in America, it’s Tax Day-good luck and may God have mercy on your soul!
(Photo credit Charles Shultz)
©Copyright Meredith Shafer 2015
I’m feeling awesome as I was just nominated for my first award, the Versatile Blogger Award! Many, many thanks to https://partandparcel2014.wordpress.com/ for the nomination! You should go check out her blog when you can.
So the rules are:
1) Acknowledge the blog that nominated you
2) Tell 7 facts about yourself
3) Nominate blogs you like or follow for the award
As for the 7 facts, here we go:
-I’m directionally challenged. Throw me in the middle of any large city and I’ll show you its Bermuda Triangle of roads (aka, where I would consistently get lost) within ten minutes.
-I love cupcakes! So much that I dedicated a chapter to the luscious little treats in my book (shameless plug!).
-I met my husband Mr. Wonderful, who is built like an NFL linebacker through ballroom dancing. He is the one of us who is a certified ballroom dance instructor.
-There are four kids who call me Mama (more if they have friends over). Two are adopted, two are biological, all are ridiculously hilarious and adoringly loved.
-For fifteen years I didn’t eat meat. Then I got pregnant with our youngest whom we still call Bacon. Guess what I was craving for nine months?
-I have a music degree and a law degree but I’d rather write books.
-My marriage proposal from Mr. Wonderful contained both a rodeo clown and a jumbotron. Not many gals can say that!
As for my nominations, since I’m always late to the party, humor me if you’ve already been nominated. In fact, as these are all amazing blogs, I’m sure you’ve been nominated but just go with it!
Go check out these wonderful blogs and read about some amazing people doing life well. Blessings!
©Copyright Meredith Shafer 2015
To my family:
Have a blessed Monday!!!
(Photo credit Pinterest)
Copyright Meredith Shafer 2015